I'll never forget what my dad said when I gave him a picture I drew and asked him to put it on the refrigerator: "You're 22."
I want to meet the corporate manager of Wal-Mart who said: "Our customers are really smart, let's do self checkout".
Top stock tip: California and two other states legalized marijuana. Invest in Doritos and Taco Bell!!! :D
Why the hell am I hearing Jingle Bells in Nov? I would support legislation that makes it illegal to promote Christmas prior to Dec. 20th. :D
Its 1:30am and I'm going to bed. Damn, I must be getting old because at this hour on a Saturday nite I'm usually just getting warmed up. :D
78 degrees in SoCal, setting outside the pub, having a Guinness with the wife after a nice bike ride. It don't get better than this. ;)
This delicious hot bacon I'm eating just burnt my mouth really bad... Why is it always the ones you love that hurt you the most?
I hate when I'm just in for an oil change and the mechanic tries to hustle me with irrelevant questions like "hey who's that in the trunk?”
Im not one to brag but People say I have a unique way of lighting up a room. It's called arson and those people are called witnesses. :D