Funny

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by beerbelly, Nov 4, 2020.

  1. Lincolnut

    Lincolnut In Third Gear

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    Artesia New Mexico
    That is why I don't look in the mirror..........When did you take my photo..........lol
     
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  2. TestDummy

    TestDummy In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    The problem with this one is,....even in 1980, when I started working on cars, 'most' teenage boys weren't. I would put it at 10% that knew how to put on brake shoes, and maybe 5% could put an engine together and drop it in. Most teenage boys in my day were jocks.
     
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  3. Hillbilly

    Hillbilly In Maximum Overdrive

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    The numbers you stated Sean, they fit my area back in the early 1970's too. The guys with a farming background turned into mechanics while the urban guys gravitated into being jocks. Numbers heavily favored the jocks who ended up selling insurance or being stuck in some other mundane retail or factory position.
    I rather enjoyed the farming aspect, all the thrill of going to Vegas while never having to leave the farm. Making a profit every year was a big gamble but being able to repair cars filled in the gaps and kept food on the table. The mechanic ability looked better and better as big corporations caused the farmer to need around three thousand acres of crops to make a decent profit. Priced a new big tractor or combine lately ? A semi-truck to haul the grain ? Tools of the trade, much more reasonable to invest in tools needed to repair vehicles. Still a challenge but much less risk involved.
     
  4. beerbelly

    beerbelly In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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  5. plumcolr

    plumcolr In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    Shamelessly stolen from Ace of Spades:




    The taxation office suspected a fishing boat owner wasn't paying proper wages to his deckhand and sent an auditor to investigate him.


    Auditor: "I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them."

    Boat Owner: "Well, there's Clarence, my deckhand, he's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $1,000 a week plus free room and board. Then there's the mentally challenged guy. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of Bundaberg rum and a dozen Crown Lagers every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also gets to sleep with my wife occasionally."

    Auditor: "That's the guy I want to talk to - the mentally challenged one."


    Boat Owner: "That'll be me. What'd you want to know?"
     
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  6. beerbelly

    beerbelly In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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  7. Hillbilly

    Hillbilly In Maximum Overdrive

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    Location:
    Winchester, TN.
    Really ?
     
  8. beerbelly

    beerbelly In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    Keeps the dust down I suppose...
     
  9. LSChero

    LSChero In Maximum Overdrive PLATINUM MEMBER

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    Location:
    Area 6 NV
    Its code here in Nevada.
    41991433_714345508913349_3732697115642560512_n.jpg
     
  10. plumcolr

    plumcolr In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    A man goes to see the Rabbi. '
    "Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it."
    The Rabbi asked, "What's wrong?"
    The man replied, "My wife is going to poison me."
    The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, "How can that be?"


    The man then pleads, "I'm telling you, I'm certain she's going to poison me.What should I do?"

    The Rabbi then offers, "Tell you what. Let me talk to her, I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know."

    A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says, "I spoke to your wife on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?

    The man said, "Yes" and the Rabbi replied, "Take the poison."
     
  11. handy_andy_cv64

    handy_andy_cv64 In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    Lady Astor: "Mister Prime Minister, if you were my husband, I should want to poison you."

    Prime Minister Churchill: "Milady, if I were your husband, I should drink it."

    (Not sure if I got the quotes correct, but a true convo.)
     
  12. Jeff B

    Jeff B In Maximum Overdrive BRONZE MEMBER

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    Location:
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    Reminds me of another...

    Bessie Braddock: Winston, you are drunk, and what’s more you are disgustingly drunk.

    Winston Churchill: Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly.
     
  13. handy_andy_cv64

    handy_andy_cv64 In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    Hahahahaha! A foremost Man of Letters with a quick, dry wit.
     
  14. beerbelly

    beerbelly In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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  15. Garbageman

    Garbageman In Overdrive

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    I like it.
     
  16. TestDummy

    TestDummy In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    There's a Nevada in the Philippines?
     
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  17. plumcolr

    plumcolr In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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  18. beerbelly

    beerbelly In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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  19. beerbelly

    beerbelly In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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  20. Garbageman

    Garbageman In Overdrive

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