Sunday Joke....

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Huevos, Jul 19, 2020.

  1. Huevos

    Huevos In Maximum Overdrive

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    Once upon a time there lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts.
    Sid, the Dragon Slayer, obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death, should he try to touch them, but he had to try.

    One day Sid revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Nathan
    the Erudite lawyer, the King's chief adviser. Nathan thought about this and said that he could arrange for Sid to more than satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1000 gold coins to arrange it. Without pause, Sid readily agreed to the scheme.

    The next day, Nathan got a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's bra while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.

    Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Nathan informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and Nathan advised that only the saliva of Sid would work as the antidote to cure the itch.

    The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned Sid to their chambers. Nathan then slipped Sid the antidote for the itching powder, which he put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Sid worked passionately on the Queen's large and magnificent breasts. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Sid left satisfied and hailed as a hero.

    Upon returning to his chamber, Sid found Nathan demanding his payment of 1000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Sid couldn't have cared less knowing that Nathan could never report this matter to the King and with a laugh told him to get lost.

    The next day, Nathan slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Sid.
     
  2. handy_andy_cv64

    handy_andy_cv64 In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    "The moral of the story? Never stiff a lawyer, for he will somehow stiff you back."
     
  3. plumcolr

    plumcolr In Maximum Overdrive SILVER MEMBER

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    Location:
    Freehold NJ
    The Saturday Night Joke

    Russ and Sam, two friends, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems.
    One day Russ didn't show up. Sam didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something. But after Russ hadn't shown up for a week or so, Sam really got worried.
    However, since the only time they ever got together was at the park,
    Sam didn't know where Russ lived, so he was unable to find out what had happened to him.


    A month had passed, and Sam figured he had seen the last of Russ, but one day, Sam approached the park and-- lo and behold! -- there sat Russ! Sam was very excited and happy to see him and told him so. Then he said, 'For crying out loud Russ, what in the world happened to you?'

    Russ replied, 'I have been in jail.'

    'Jail!' cried Sam. What in the world for?'

    'Well,' Russ said, 'you know Sue, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where I sometimes go?'

    'Yeah,' said Sam, 'I remember her. What about her?'

    'Well, the little gold-digging bitch figured I was rich and she filed rape charges against me; and, at 89 years old, I was so proud that when I got into court, I pleaded 'guilty'.

    'The judge gave me 30 days for perjury.
    .
     
    handy_andy_cv64 and Hillbilly like this.

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